Corpus Delectable  - 2012-01-11
Tears.
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Toenails - 2012-01-11
COL
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twinkieafternoon - 2012-01-11
O'Henry could learn something from this young man.
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Thirteen - 2012-01-11
Once, I was working alone at a gas station in the wee early hours of the morning, dead tired. This redneck kid walked in, a ball cap on and a toothpick stuck in his mouth. He face was so hideous I couldn't believe what I was looking at was an actual person, and in my confused state, I freaked out thinking this thing was going to kill me, a la The Hills Have Eyes. I caught my breath when he approached the counter to buy chewing tobacco and whatever, bracing to die. It was even creepier when he started talking, since usually when I see bipedal creatures that look like that, it's in the context of a haunted house where the performer is trying not to break character. He left and I was wide awake for the rest of my shift, post adrenaline rush.
This is what this guy's face reminds me of. Why can't they stop fucking their siblings out there?
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La Loco - 2012-01-11
I cried for this guy because he's either addicted to meth, got cancer or the aids. I can't imagine him living much longer. :(
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dead_cat - 2012-01-12 He's not on meth, he's got a chimp for a daddy.
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hammsangwich - 2012-01-11
I don't know if I'm being trolled or what, but FYI, this guy is a troll in case anyone above was serious.
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Toenails - 2012-01-11 COLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOL
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The Townleybomb - 2012-01-11
why was there a dimond ring
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Explodotron - 2012-01-11 Because the father of the unborn child has already told him, duh.
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dead_cat - 2012-01-12 Because of the short attention span.
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pastorofmuppets - 2012-01-12
The saddest thing is a retarded man who is crying and promising a broken egg that it will be a chicken someday.
And that they'll play together in a field when it gets better.
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Callamon - 2012-01-12
LOL I lost it when he took a bite of that mcmuffin.
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TheOtherCapnS - 2012-01-12 I nodded and exhaled some air through my nose.
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chumbucket - 2012-01-12 I'm kind of hoping this catches on as a gag similar to The Aristocrats where other YT jokers could try their hand at this and kind of make it their own.
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cognitivedissonance - 2012-01-12
Poor Michael Ian Black.
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Redford - 2012-01-12
Five stars for the google add universe pulling "Open a New Door This Lent".
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dead_cat - 2012-01-12
THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK CHIMPANZEES, PEOPLE
HOW MANY TIMES I GOT TO REMIND YOU?
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grimcity - 2012-01-12
I'm backing this guy.
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chumbucket - 2012-01-12
clever and well executed
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YakooMarkTwo - 2012-01-12 I get what he's doing... it's every teenager's profile status in that "post this if you agree" chain-letter style. I get the parody. It's just not funny.
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Burnov - 2012-01-12
Wearing your cap at a 45 degree angle is a reliable sign that you're dealing with a person of great intellect.
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Aubrey McFate - 2012-01-13
I read the version where she asks if she loves her forever and he says no and then she runs away and gets hit by a bus.
See, he was going to say he loves her FIVE-ever.
This is better.
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Aubrey McFate - 2012-01-13 That should say if HE loves her forever. I am an idiot.
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oddeye - 2014-05-13 Your post still makes no sense to me. Five-ever? What?
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oddeye - 2014-01-11
I cry
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