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Comment count is 27
The Mothership - 2012-11-18

existenz.


SixDigitDebt - 2012-11-18

is paused


MacGyver Style Bomb - 2012-11-18

Supposedly 11 hits.

Oh, and NSFW dialog.


Blue - 2012-11-18

Yeah, apparently shit like this can happen on much less than that. I spent my morning reading about bad trips. Apparently a college dorm is the worst fucking place to do acid and smoking weed is the worst fucking thing to do when you start having anxiety on acid.

Acid will make you realize the difference between a real friend and a douchebag you hang out with a lot real quick.


Kabbage - 2012-11-18

This is the truth.


dr_rock - 2012-11-21

I can attest that smoking weed when having a borderline sketchy trip is a BAD IDEA.

Dude shouldn't be taking even 1 hit. He kind of sounds like Francis E. Dec.


Ursa_minor - 2012-11-18

Whatever the fuck.


themilkshark - 2012-11-18

From Part 3:

Pain Pain pain painpainpain

free will pain fucking whatever the fuck

you indian nigger bullshit (gasp)


themilkshark - 2012-11-18

EXISTENCE


Blue - 2012-11-18

That's why you shouldn't ever use the N-word, even when nobody's around to hear it. That shit will come pouring out of your head when you don't want it to and now you're the naked racist guy on acid getting arrested.

Of course, I don't really get the fucking appeal in the first place. I understand being so mad you want to say something to hurt someone, but why that? It says more about you than it does about them. Why not yell other embarrassing facts about yourself?


Kabbage - 2012-11-18

I honestly think he was half just saying the first thing that came to his mind, and half trying to make an incomprehensible point about labels in our society. You'll notice he backed down completely the second that word left his mouth, following it up with a string of more and more general terms like "mammalian" and "anamalian"


Maru - 2012-11-18

Why don't you every time all the time!?


Maru - 2012-11-18

simple as that.


Kabbage - 2012-11-18

Just a pure, insane deconstruction of a college-age freshman kid.

3:05-3:20 is the existential nightmare in a nutshell.

I am high enough and fascinated enough by this rant that I've transcribed it
below:

"Listen to me. WHATEVER THE FUCK you would like to call 'IT'. Would you like
to suck on my donkey penis asshole butthole fuck-you middle-fingers-thumbs-
up-the-asshole What ever the fuck you would like to call this-this-this-
this-this-THIS (probably pointing to different things on his body)", but the
floating brain, or what brain which was still still at primitive, (rated?) my
EXISTANCE, DEATH, whatever you WANT to do, all the time, EVERY time. As
simple as that."

"Whatever the fuck your name is, because I have ADHD, and I don't have your
FUCKING NAME. ON THE GODDAMN CARD. OR FUCKING, WHATEVER THE FUCK YOU WANT TO
CALL IT! AND I'M ONLY ANGRY, OR WHATEVER THE FUCK YOU WANT TO CALL IT,
Because I can't get my POINT across, because because I have, WHATEVER you
want to tell my DAD! Communication device! Or I'll walk, float, whatever the
fuck, I don't give a bullshit, primate, ape-sucking, donkey... whatever the
fuck. Continue."

"This is more important, than your entire life. Come over here. Come ov-
like, this is, okay, listen, this is,

okay. Listen. I need my dad on the phone. Or, whatever you need to call on
the phone.

I did, acids, with this crazy colorful, or whatever the fuck you want to call
it. And, by whatever existence, and let's just all have a good time together,
and live in existence! For one reason. Gh- Nha-"

>> -Unintelligible murmuring-

"Dud- Not in a futuristic society! No! I- Completely! I agree! Excuse my
French, bullshit, pimples, small-nose, I-don't-have-enough... what the fuck.
And join ME in my EXISTANCE, in this bullshit Exit door, whatever-the-I'm
tripping on too much acid, and I've bloodied my hand, and whatever to do with
THIS and THIS and this and THIS (pointing to different things on his
body),... I'm a PRIMATIVE... listen to me... sir."

>> "Yeah, no, I'm listening. *nervous laughter* "

"Listen, We need Julian, my existence dad, who is aged consistence whatever,
with this deficiency of my own free will, existence together, in a neo-
whatever your bullshit suck my donkey asshole, pubes suck my, stupid and
mammalian whatever the fuck you wanna call it, because of my FREE WILL, is
that I would have like, a THOUSAND LONG with these acid trip, with whatever
you want to call THAT?? am I right?! Whoever your name is, I pardon the
*cough* pardon the *cough cough* 'casue I have NOT established the, whatever
the bullshit, contextualized, uh (culinary?). Come join me in my flying,
whatever, bullshit, and suck my asshole donkey whatever the fuck bullshit,
asshole, pubes, ANYTHING. any exciting EXISTANCE, because you're (a couple
who float on?) existence. HehEXISTANCE!!!

>> Do you

>>
And that's because the "

"And that's why, the older, the refuse my EXISTANCE. Because I am whatever
the fuck - you know. Right? I know... (?) bullshit, spiralsey talk, to
communicate my ideas, I don't give one fuck in the entire world, suck my
asshole, donkey, whatever the fuck you want to call it. My EXISTANCE. in my
seq-"

*Sees the camera*

"Wai-wait, listen-listen to me listen to me. Th- anybody- would like any-
anybody... like to..."

*Looks to crowd*

"...continue?"

>> "You're not talking to anybody else."

"...for any-purpose, in hum- in the fate of ANYTHING!!(?) ... I don't care!"

*looks at crowd expectedly*

>> "...They're not listening to anybody, buddy."

*turns away in a huff, hands in air, toward cameraman*

*fed up:* "But that's your purpose... in my... existence. Listen to me. Sir!"

*addressing cameraman, walking towards camera*

"Sir! Existence! Existence! Will we all have a good time together?
Existence."

*Doorman closes door*

"So I don't have to... bullshit... DOORS, bullshit, existence..."

*walks to guy looking out his door across the hallway*

"whatever your name is, because I still don't have a... goddamn FLIGHT
MOTHEFUCK FUCK YOU!!"

*walks further down the hall, addressing audience*

"...AND MY FUCKING CELL PHONE. (Blokay?) WHATEVER YOU WANT TO CALL IT, IN MY
EXISTANCE. BECAUSE I DON'T HAVE A GODDAMN, WHATEVER THE FUCK YOU WANT TO CALL
IT, IN MY EXISTANCE, IN MY EX-ISTANCE, if you need to put, nomenclature to,
faster communicate, whejhe- anybody. Anybody?

*Addressing one member of the crowd*

"You're in BOULDER. You're a hippy! Communication! ..."

*approaching sirens audible*

*I think he's pointing to different people in the group right now, one by
one, going down a list.*

"...Socialism! Neoism, - whatever the fuck YOU - Industrialism, ...you want
to call it, can I PLEASE have a goddamn cell phone so I can float over to my
existence... whatever... and discuss him, so I discuss him so he doesn't have
to DIE, whatever, cause I'm not intellectual enough!"

>> You jus- you talk to US. (I think in response to his request for the cell
phone)

"Whatever! So I can have just..."

>> "Whoop WHOOP!"

"...this idea of what that stupid brain thing from Furutama is, because I'm a
FUTURAMA fan..."

>> Some guy laughs

"...that's probably why I'm here in the first place... I don't give a FUCK
YOU, in the entire... listen to me - whatever your name is - I don't give a
fuck. Simple as that! I'm... I'm... excuse me."

>> Fleeing students walk into the cameraman's room

>> Under his breath, as he and two girls walk past, "Yeah, Owen's got
this..."

"Because I need to avoid something or other, in my existence. Right? Where...
life is... no more of our problem, we just all life in a social, deal, (or
deo-)bullshit I don't give a fuck YOU in my entire EXISTANCE. EXISTANCE,
right? I have some freckly, bullshit, not-big-enough (cayin?), going to
school for some bullshit, listen to me-"

>> Police officer arrives

>> "MISTER GARMAN, LIE DOWN! LIE DOWN ON THE GROUND! LIE DOWN! RIGHT NOW!"

"I don't give a fuck YOU. I don't give a fuck to you in existence, sir,
whatever your name is! No! Listen, my purpose is-"

>>" YOU NEED TO SIT DOWN! SIT DOWN!"

*Part 2*

"...Because you look socially... so- or you have- whatever the fuck you want
to call THAT-"

*points at two cops present, maybe at their drawn batons*

>> "SIT DOWN MAN"

"-for what purpose, -?"

>> "Get on the ground!"

>> "YOU NEED TO SIT DOWN!"

"Excuse me, excuse me, excuse me! You don't have a big enough brain-!"

>> "SIT DOWN!"

"Listen to me! Listen to me!

>> "You need to SIT DOWN-!"

"Violence! Violence! Violence is a problem. Genetic, you- whatever you want
to- fuck- gainst my existence? Is a goddamn fucking PROBLEM, I want my DAD
fucking here so I can (pigs?), whatever the fuck- FUCK YOU!

>> "GET YOUR ARM BACK!"

"FUCK YOU!"

>> "PUT YOUR ARM BACK!"

"FUCK YOU why were you stripping me?! That was my only privilege, and goal?!
And LISTEN TO ME! Listen to me, I'm on to something, I'm on to something so
shut the fuck up!"

>> "You're going to get tased! You have to STOP MOVING!"

"I don't give a fuck about a taser! I don't give a fuck about it! I have
pain! I don't give a- FUCK YOU, and the entire, goddamn, fucking (right
wing?) existence, into giving me pain! Because I don't have
(unintelligible)...because I have, practically bullshit (I won't be a missing
persons?) because (of)"

"Pain! Pain is a problem, in communications! Ehg! And my father!"

>> "STOP RESISTING."

"I've resistance!"

>> "Stop resisting."

"Purpose resistance, um- free will- uh- fractally bullshit I appreciate, and
exist, together, bullshit I want my dad to like-"

>> "Relax!"

"ADHD, other people! I DON'T GIVE A MOTHER FUCK EXISTANCE!"

>> "Relax."

"Pain, pain, pain, pain, bullshit, Obama, bullshit. Existence..."

>> "Relax!"

"I don't give a f- Whatever 'Relax' is... purpose... fu- uh-"

>> "(something) favorite (something)?"

"I don't give a fuck about whatever the fuck any of what THAT is... Uhhh ha-
HA! Spirally bullshit, whatever the fuck- voice... or whatever the fuc-
KNEEL! KNEEL! KNEEL!"

>> "STOP FIGHTING!"

"KNEEL! Fighting! Purpose of fighting! Purpose of fighting! Excuse me sir,
whatever the fuck you... life death, whatever, any problem in your time,
like, I will (smart?) or break efficiently, whatever the FUCK YOU NIGGERS!"

"I don't give a MOTHER FUCK in the ENTIRE WORLD. Stop... FUCK YOU!"

"FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU! BOYS!"

>> "GET YOUR ARM OUT!"

"(ME! WEED!?) (WOMEN?) (PERKINS?) FREE WILL! NEO-WHATEVER THE FUCK YOU, OBAMA
BULLSHIT!!"

"PAIN!! PAIN!! PAIN!! COMMUNICATION!! GRANDMOTHERS!! GRANDMOTHERS!! BOYS!!
ANYTHING IN YOUR EXISTANCE!! WHATEVER THE FUCK OTHER PEOPLE'S 'COOL SHIT'
IS!! I'M A SMART, BULLSHIT, NOT-SNOOKIE-BUTTHOLE-LICKING EXISTANCE OF PAIN!!
PAIN!! PLEASE SOMEBODY!! PAIN!! PAIN!!"

"What is the purpose of pain in my existence? Existence. Whatever the fuck
you want to call this notion (why we're?) bullshit, visual, bullshit,
mother-fuck you trippy-visual, Boulder... you know-"

"l-listen to me, listen to me, existence, whatever (blood?) bullshit,
offence- because that's an industrialized idea - purpose. Purpose. Purpose.
Because you're an intellectual. Not African, which is RACIST! Which is NOT
against your FUCKING FREE WILL, PHONE-VAGILLY-"

*PART 3*

"...Whatever the FUCK YOU ALL, fractally, spirally, communications-involved,
ahhhh pain! Involve fists, why don- whatever (preminish?) nobilian niggerish
FUCK YOU OFFICERS PAIN! PAIN PAIN PAIN PAIN!! FUCK YOU ALL! FUCK YOU ALL."

"Communications, future-"

>> "Kay, we need to get him on the slide."

"BULL-SHIT BECAUSE I AM ALL EXISTANCE!!"

...

"OBAMA, MITT ROMNEY, FUCKING BULLSHIT, COLLABORATIVE, SPIRALLY BULLSHIT I
CAN'T EVEN SEE, TRYING TO SKIP THE VOTERS, PAIN PAIN PAINPAINPAINPAINPAIN.
PAIN!!"

"FUCK YOU AND THE ENTIRE EXISTANCE, PAIN!! ACID, BULLSHIT, TRIPPY, WHERE THIS
IS FROWNED DOWN UPON. WHERE WE SHOULD ENCOURAGE THIS, WHERE WE SHOULD DISCUSS
THIS, WITH OTHER PEOPLE, WITHOUT SOME BULLSHIT LICK-MY-ASSHOLE PAIN-
(PUMPKIN?), WHATEVER-THE-FUCK-YOU-WANT-EXISTANCE."

"Free will existence. Free will pain, whatever the fuck - you Indian,
Nigger-bullshit, Mammalian, Amanalian, Educational, (circying?), fatherly,
genetic, life is (suvistic?), PURPOSE."

"Purpose, everbody please, you're... FUCKING stupid, niggerish, idea,
existence, whatever-the-fuck-YOU existence. I have genetic existence, for
this existence, develop me EXISTANCE, Existence. Existence. I don't give a
shit, Life School, Blood, I don't fuck-you, taser for this pain! Pain please,
somebody. Spirally, discoey..."

...

"You have an iPhone, suck my donkey-hole. Penis. Suck my dick. Obama. Mitt
Ro- Pain. This taser exists as PAIN!!"

He literally just says "existence", "Neo-", "Neo-Geo-Political", "Obama", "Suck my penis", and "Bullshit" over and over, for the entire last two videos.

At one point he says "Fuck you EXISTANCES.", "YOU'RE IN INFERIOR EXISTANCES", and, I shit you not, "SUCK MY PAIN"

Near the endgame he is literally just throwing out any words he can think of that sound vaguely intellectual - "futurism" "nomenclature" "fractally"

It is the horrifying display of a child trying desperately and uncontrollably audibly to maintain his status as being perceived as smart.

Apparently he also broke a window during this.


Scynne - 2012-11-18

You are the hero of the century.


Jane Error - 2012-11-18

All the calls to Daddy were especially revealing.


Old People - 2012-11-18

Wow!


Jet Bin Fever - 2012-11-18

Poetry from the deepest regions of the soul.


FABIO - 2012-11-18

I was going to say, this just sounds like a more frantic version of every drunk pseudo-intellectual college conversation ever.


Twitch - 2012-11-18

Aww c'mon who here hasn't been arrested tripping their balls off?


memedumpster - 2012-11-18

Hahaha, his brain was set to output to file, but he was given an invalid path.

Dumb kids + strong drugs = tard slappin' fun!


gravelstudios - 2012-11-18

I commuted from home through most of college. My junior year, I decided to try living in the dorm. I lasted 5 weeks before moving back in with my parents. I just couldn't handle this kind of thing.


FABIO - 2012-11-18

Macks earplugs saved my life in college.


Doomstein - 2012-11-18

I used to wear Winchester shooting earmuffs whie sleeping in my college dorm. They literally cancelled out every sound, and everything was right with the universe... until there was a freak earthquake in the Gulf of Mexico that was felt in Tampa and they tried to get me to evacuate the building, but I couldn't hear the banging on my dorm room door. I just contently kept on sleeping, dead to the world. After that I just put up with the stereos and beer bottles clanking together.


FABIO - 2012-11-18

Well? What DO you call it?


dairyqueenlatifah - 2012-11-18

Nothing this exciting ever happened in my residence hall. All we got were drunk guys three doors down from me screaming "ANYONE WANNA PLAY HALO?!?!?!?" down the hall at 3AM during finals.


Rudy - 2012-11-19

SUCK MY PAVILLION


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