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Comment count is 11
snothouse - 2013-05-04

That "portal movement" one the laziest programming moves I've seen.


Sexy Duck Cop - 2013-05-04

Everything about this game is so aggressively lazy you have to admire the cojones.


Nominal - 2013-05-04

Oh god noooooooooooooooooo!!!

Whenever we visited my boring out of state relatives when I was a kid, my parents would make it up by buying me something from the mall. This game was my choice for that year. I was depressed for a month after.

The computer took longer to make moves than my Commodore 64 version of Battle Chess. Almost 20 seconds for queen's pawn forward two opener? Really?

The music!

Every piece used the exact same attack and death animation no matter the matchup.

This definitely needs a "Capstone" tag. I forget what other games they made but I remember they were all equally terrible. Time to hunt them down!


Nominal - 2013-05-04

Capstone games using the Wolfenstein 3D engine

Corridor 7: Alien Invasion
Operation Body Count

Capstone games using the Build engine

William Shatner's TekWar
Witchaven:Dare to Enter
Witchaven II: Blood Vengeance
Corridor 8: Galactic Wars (prototype)
Fate (a demo was released before it was canceled)

Other games developed by Capstone

Anyone for Cards?
Bill & Ted's Excellent Adventure
Cardinal of the Kremlin
Casino Tournament of Champions
Discoveries of the Deep
Eternam
Exotic Car Showroom
Grandmaster Chess
Miami Vice
Monte Carlo Baccarat
Search for the Titanic
Surf Ninjas
Taking of Beverly Hills
Terminator 2: Judgment Day - Chess Wars
Trump Castle
Trump Castle 2
Trump Castle 3
Wayne's World
Zorro

Games distributed by Capstone

An American Tail: The Computer Adventures of Fievel and His Friends
Bridge Master
Dark Half
Home Alone
Home Alone 2: Lost in New York
Homey D. Clown
L.A. Law
Superman: The Man of Steel
Trolls


garcet71283 - 2013-05-04

Wow, that is a depressing library


Burnov - 2013-05-04

Oh man, please tell me somebody else played witchhaven 2.


Nominal - 2013-05-04

Even more depressing when you realize Corridor 7, a Wolfenstein clone, was released four months AFTER Doom.


boner - 2013-05-04

OK so I looked them up on Wikipedia, they have an article with no references whatsoever, and it's in a category of "Low-importance video game articles" which has 26,941 entries.


CornOnTheCabre - 2013-05-04

I am getting way too worked up over how the Arnold T-800 is the King piece in this game. Why would it be him (the robot hero who doesn't make it out of the last scene alive, spoilers), and not John Connor (the character whose continued survival the entire plot of Terminator 2 is centered around)

although i guess it's STILL better than "exoskeleton" and "blue exoskeleton"


CornOnTheCabre - 2013-05-04

*endoskeleton


Burnov - 2013-05-04

Yeah, I don't know what the logic behind that was.


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