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Comment count is 41
chumbucket - 2013-05-29

Go away...forever. Banishment spell prepped and ready. Roll for effect.


Riskbreaker - 2013-05-29

Problem is, we will see her in another 100 years, thirsty for the souls of men. Hopefully a group of warriors will appear, and seal her again in her tomb of darkness.


baleen - 2013-05-29

Banishment into a world of plush fundraisers, lucrative book deals and well-compensated nightly half-hour sermons on Fox News!


jaunch - 2013-05-29

Seriously. Hopefully some horrible scandal is about to break, and that's why she's bailing. But more likely she's going to be an anchor on Fox News making a lot more money.


TheOtherCapnS - 2013-05-29

I know it's too much to hope for on the scandal front, but given what everyone knows about her husband along with the fact that Minnesota recently passed a marriage equality bill...


jangbones - 2013-05-29

Possible, but more likely she is leaving to take advantage of the lucrative hate-spreading market.

It worked for Caribou Barbie, she makes a lot more money now than she ever did in politics.


GQ - 2013-05-29

ACtually, the FBI is investigating her for some major funny business in her financials from her presidential primary campaign, so... FINGERS CROSSED!


StanleyPain - 2013-05-29

There already is a scandal, it's just that the media is downplaying it what with being more concerned over the IRS non-scandal and BENGHAZI!11! and Umbrellagate.

Basically she did a lot of illegal shit with her PAC money and campaign funds and since one of the things she DIDN'T do with her money was actually pay her campaign staff, they're basically telling all to the government.


SteamPoweredKleenex - 2013-05-30

Yeah, the Benghazi thing has staying power that's just baffling. All most conservatives can muster is that a talking point was changed from "terrorism" to "act of terror" and that one of our ambassadors was killed.

Not that it wasn't a tragedy, but compared to what's come before... so fucking what? I'd put the scandal over Pat Tillman up against this so-called "impeachable offense" any day of the week. Not to mention Condi Rice changing what the definition of terrorism was for the state department so that the tally of terrorist acts under Bush post-invasion would appear small when it was actually getting worse.

Fuck the GOP and the media for latching onto it as if it actually had this much importance.


The Mothership - 2013-05-29

Lie. Lie. Lie. Subterfuge. Avoidance. Grandstanding. Lie. Lie. Rhetoric. Nonsense. Rhetoric. Lie. Rhetoric. Rhetorical buzzwords. Grandstanding. Muslim-bashing. Buzzwords. Words that don't work together. Lie. Bullshit. Nonsense sentence. Equating criticism with success. Calling out the Haterz. Reference to Family. Blessing.


Not quite the Sarah Palin resignation speech, but close.


Bort - 2013-05-29

I guess de-gaying her husband is a full time job.


Kabbage - 2013-05-29

hahaha


Nikon - 2013-05-29

I'm glad to see her leave. I wish it had happened earlier, but this is all right too.


Hailey2006 - 2013-05-29

Don't get your hopes up, the right will come up with somebody even crazier!


jangbones - 2013-05-29

Ted Cruz is doing a good job right now.


memedumpster - 2013-05-29

We understand, musical chairs is no fun with tacks in them.


TheOtherCapnS - 2013-05-29

Maybe this is the tide starting to turn. She's been serving in the House for six years, and even people in her own party avoid her like the plague despite the rabid TP support. Maybe this is some tacit acknowledgement that rabid zealots aren't the best at politics, and maybe the republicans will continue distancing themselves from the fundamentalist nutjobs and will stop running sideshows for office so often.

Or yea, maybe someone just finally got photos of all of Marcus Bachmann's holes filled with cocks.


MongoMcMichael - 2013-05-29

Good riddance, you wild-eyed fag-hag cunt.


asian hick - 2013-05-30

fuck off.


joelkazoo - 2013-05-29

I'm not watching this. I'm just so elated that she's not going to embarrass my state anymore. Don't let the door hit you on the arse on the way out!


Caminante Nocturno - 2013-05-29

Ratings and comments have been disabled for this video.

Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha!


Jet Bin Fever - 2013-05-29

Best news I've gotten all day!


Mother_Puncher - 2013-05-29

Way to go out looking like a fucking dumbass.


Rodents of Unusual Size - 2013-05-30

looking like?


cognitivedissonance - 2013-05-29

If you can't go out on top, go out before your ethics investigation is drawn out during a down news cycle for your ideological opponent.


The God of Biscuits - 2013-05-29

"I'm not running again, and it has nothing to do with my inability to get votes or a giant ethics investigation into my activities. I just decided to quit for no reason whatsoever."

Good riddance


cognitivedissonance - 2013-05-29

"I can't even get a positive word from GARRISON KEILLOR, the man who can somehow find a compliment sandwich softball for Charles Manson."


dairyqueenlatifah - 2013-05-29

I like how she actually says that, with zero irony, less than a minute into the video.

Wow.


SteamPoweredKleenex - 2013-05-29

Her entire legislative history:

http://emergentpattern.tumblr.com/post/51671540619/lol


Paracelsus - 2013-05-29

Ok, let's see how the Sarah Palin career path works out for you, now that everyone knows exactly how silly you are.


SteamPoweredKleenex - 2013-05-29

But... I thought everyone knew how silly Palin was, too. The only difference was she had Alaska for a reality show backdrop.


SchlongChimp - 2013-05-30

I think Palin was perceived to have "going nude" potential because of here trashy background.


Paracelsus - 2013-05-30

Good points. But doesn't it seem to you that Bachman is of a higher degree of stupidity and cluelessness and has less charisma than ol' Palin?


Father Avalanche - 2013-05-29

She is the Darkness.


Sexy Duck Cop - 2013-05-29

That music makes me want to have a montage that at some point involves doing karate on the beach.


gazebo - 2013-05-29

I think she's dropping out to run against Franken next year. At least I hope so just for the debates.


Quad9Damage - 2013-05-29

I don't get it. The first 45 seconds of this is her meandering about constitutional law but right after that she starts speaking in Screeching She-Bitch. I had a tough time figuring out which layer of hell her dialect was from so I couldn't finish this, sorry.


The Mothership - 2013-05-30

oh you must stick it out, it's beautiful.


Rodents of Unusual Size - 2013-05-30

I tapped out after she listed going to a funeral as an accomplishment.

Good luck with whatever puppies you and your bumbling gay valet try to steal, Cruella.


RockBolt - 2013-05-30

My favorite Bachmann memory
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_HE-yx_jzVM


JesusKhan - 2013-05-31

Listen carefully to the cadence of her speech. Her tone is effervescent with the bubbles of amusement reaching the surface of every sentence wherein even she isn't stupid enough to believe the shit coming out of her smug face.


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