|Syd Midnight |
Mediocre as an amusingly-recut EIT thing, but good source material:
I should have submitted this one instead; Every Young Man's Battle - The Movie:
|Miss Henson's 6th grade class |
Oh, wow, the football coach pastor is SOMETHING ELSE.
I'M JOHN MADDEN, AND WELCOME BACK TO MADDENSTRABATION 2014.
NOW ON THIS PLAY, THE QB MADE A BIG MISTAKE. HE SCANS THE FIELD, LOCATES SOME FIRST-RATE LADY PARTS ON HIS COMPUTER, AND YOU KNOW, WHEN YOU SEE AN OPENING LIKE THAT, PAT, YOU'VE GOT TO MAKE A MOVE.
BUT THEN HE MAKES THE MISTAKE OF GETTING ALL EXCITED, *THEN* REACHING FOR THE LUBE. AND OF COURSE, IT'S NOWHERE TO BE FOUND. CLASSIC ROOKIE BLUNDER, PAT!
(John draws a circle around the lube, then an arrow pointing in the direction of the penis)
YOU'VE GOT TO GET YOUR LUBE IN POSITION BEFORE YOU START THE PLAY! OTHERWISE, BY THE TIME YOU FIND IT BEHIND YOUR GROSS UNWASHED FUTON, IT'S BEEN FIVE MINUTES AND YOUR WINDOW OF OPPORTUNITY'S CLOSED. YOU HATE TO SEE A PLAY FALL APART LIKE THAT.
Sanest Man Alive
Why a football coach, anyway? I thought the whole point was NOT scoring.
Apparently the right way to prevent young boys from simulating sex is by forcing them to simulate war.
|Jet Bin Fever |
HAHAHAHAHA. So many good lines. I can't wait to watch the original.
The Church Of Porn
"If you did a pornography addiction weekend at a chuch, nobody would come!"
So is this "purrnography" they're talking about porn with cats? Because that's just wrong.
Until you understand that you are not your own, and that you don't have a right to look at these things, you'll never win!
So he has the same relationship with God that I do with my Domme? Except, of course, he never gets permission and there are never any consequences to his actions. That's a recipe for increasing levels of shame, desperation, and escalating immoral behavior.
I remember reading an interview with a guy that got caught putting hidden cameras in a women's restroom. He was one of these fucks, through and through. Kept talking about his struggles with pornography. That's the problem with a moral compass that essentially says "do whatever the fuck you want, as long as you feel bad about it and apologize".
Was that being narrated at a Civil War battlefield?
|Sanest Man Alive |
"The most common interest among serial killers is pornography"
Really now? I always thought it was, y'know, killing. I guess that connection was just too obvious. Do you know what else is common among serial killers? An abusive, religious upbringing with warped, repressive attitudes about sex!
|Juice Eggs McKenna |
Blasted, blindsided by the oncoming, uh, offensive lineman
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