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Comment count is 26
TeenerTot - 2013-09-24

I can't decide what's my favorite part.

The spectators?
The stand-there-and-shoot tactics?
The fact that stand-there-and-shoot is enough to exhaust these guys?
The flash of belly beneath the under armor tee?


Jet Bin Fever - 2013-09-25

These men are ATHLETES. DON'T LAUGH AT THEM.


zurf - 2013-09-24

whoever edited this footage did a great job at making it seem like something is happening


RocketBlender - 2013-09-24

I used to work at an arcade that had a Lasertron arena. (Main Event) All the time, you'd see kids doing this kind of shit, or standing slightly bow legged, leaning back as though they were playing limbo, with their gun held over their chest plate, awkwardly zapping away like a stomach mounted turret with no accuracy. I'd always look the other way when someone would knock them over with a light tap or bumping into them running by.

This video brings all that to a whole new level of sad.


RocketBlender - 2013-09-24

Almost forgot, stars for the fact that Lasertron's announcer voice, and terrible fucking music, hasn't changed since I worked there 12 years ago as a teenager. I wonder if they had to watch the same training video beforehand as well.


EvilHomer - 2013-09-24

Does the whole "standing like a gimp and firing wildly from the stomach" thing actually work, is it just something stupid people do?


RocketBlender - 2013-09-24

Not really. I mean, it does make you harder to hit, but you look like an idiot and can barely aim. Usually the kids that tried it had relatively low scores compared to the ones that actually ran around and played the game, plus they looked like they were having more fun.


StanleyPain - 2013-09-24

I used to play Photon as a kid and even back then there were dipshits who acted like this. Back then, you had to wear a ton of equipment (plus an 18 pound battery belt), but it was pretty funny seeing guys try all these weird tactics when, ultimately, it was super easy to just sneak up behind them in the darkness and fog and just score a ton of easy hits on them. Ultimately the object of the game (in team mode at least) was to protect a goal, but most of the douches were more concerned beating up on little kids and such, so winning was really easy sometimes as they wouldn't defend their goal at all.


EvilHomer - 2013-09-24

From the uploader:

"This was shot with 3 cameras in a small one-level laser tag arena. It was used in an attempt at crowd sourcing a unique one-on-one tournament.

Competitive team tag is nothing like birthday party laser tag. Apologies to those whose fantasy style play was ruined by this."



Suck it, trolls! gb2 ur birthday parties and let the REAL MEN play competitive laser tag.


Nikon - 2013-09-24

I hope this becomes a category in the Olympics.


Caminante Nocturno - 2013-09-24

It's going to be tough choosing between this and Starcraft.


Nikon - 2013-09-25

I gotta give the edge to Starcraft. The matches are more exciting to watch.


Gmork - 2013-09-25

Fuck that, I may be beating a dead horse but Myth is the best 1v1 strategy game ever made. Specifically Myth 2, Myth 3 doesn't even count and was made by people who aren't me or bungie.

For cool people, b.net does not immediately make you think of battle.net. It makes you think of bungie.net.


Riskbreaker - 2013-09-24

How is this different from playing paintball?


spikestoyiu - 2013-09-24

How is it similar?


Hooker - 2013-09-24

They're both grown men running around with toys LARPing.


bac - 2013-09-24

You can actually get hurt playing paintball.


Hooker - 2013-09-24

You can actually get hurt picking your nose.


Mister Yuck - 2013-09-25

As a guy with a paintball gun, they're about equal in terms of guys with testosterone issues chest thumping. Especially in the competitive, small arena style 'speedball' games. Fat guys with expensive guns are termed 'back players' and essentially act as stationary turrets that lean in and out of cover in a way that's actually pretty reminiscent of this nonsense.

The difference is in paintball you get to run around and get dirty, and if you don't take it seriously that's just as much fun now as it was when you were 12. Plus the fat guys bleed when you shoot 'em.


FABIO - 2013-09-25

Holy shit did Speedball ruin paintball. It's gotten so popular that I don't know any fields that still run non-speeball games where you actually get to run around the woods.

And it's all because of fat beardo manchildren who demand the field cater to them and their fatness by eliminating any movement from the games.

No joke, "pro" games are nothing but them standing there wiggling their trigger finger until one team is eliminated. That is, until one team has all their members called out by a ref. These fat fucks are such scumbags that they'll cheat and wipe off any hits a ref doesn't see.


Hooker - 2013-09-25

God, play a real sport.


Crab Mentality - 2013-10-19

If you get two guys with paintball guns standing within ten feet of each other at all times unloading into each other, I'll pay five bucks to watch.


Vaidency - 2013-09-24

So we've finally found the source material for gun kata.


Riskbreaker - 2013-09-25

NOT WITHOUT INCIDENT

A fat incident in this case....


chumbucket - 2013-09-25

So it's fencing without the...skill.


Needtodestroy - 2013-09-27

This is the slap fight of the lazer world.


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