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Desc:More 'HOLY SHIT NOT RELAXING' from my journey into the ASMR underbelly of Youtube.
Category:Horror
Tags:creepy, heads, massage, ASMR, SWITCHSCISSORS
Submitted:baleen
Date:11/29/13
Views:3590
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Comment count is 16
Riskbreaker - 2013-11-30

"you look tense..."


memedumpster - 2013-11-30

One of the instructions for all cameras should be "before use, make sure you're not a psycho."


RocketBlender - 2013-11-30

Can someone explain what exactly ASMR is? Judging from the linked videos, it's either a massage technique or an awkward roleplaying fetish.


baleen - 2013-11-30

ASMR stands for autosensory meridian response.
It is a pseudo-scientific* therapy who's providers try to conjure that tingly, relaxing feeling you get when you zone out to relaxing things in order to help people with sleep and anxiety problems.

You know that feeling you might have gotten watching someone draw as a kid? Or hearing pleasant fingernail tapping or rain falling on a roof? Bob Ross? That's ASMR, in a nutshell. I find it to be more effective in knocking me out than medication and even daily exercise when the ENDLESS MENTAL CIRCUS encroaches as I'm trying to fall asleep.

Like anything, there is a freakish, awful, exploitative, cultish, fetishistic side to ASMR. I will try to bring POETV the absolute worst examples of this shit as I continue on my road to healing.


*Not to say it's baseless. A lot of research is being directed toward figuring out what exactly is happening in the brain that makes people feel so good, and it's gaining support as a valid form of "relaxation therapy."


Nominal - 2013-11-30

It seems like some people want to elevate it to special snowflake status where they "brag" how they have to sleep in Daredevil's isolation tub the way tumblr kids compete with who has the best combo of rare mental disorders.


kingofthenothing - 2013-11-30

MAKE SURE TO RUB TEH OIL RIGHT INTO THE EYEBALLS, MMM, RELAXING, NOTHING LIKE SOME GUY'S DIRTY FINGERS AND OIL ALL UP IN YOUR EYES... JUST RELAAAAXX...


baleen - 2013-11-30

Nominal, I think I kind of understand what you're saying but not really. If you're referring to me personally, I am definitely not bragging. In terms of insomnia I am two noses short of full on W.C. Fields, who went through a period where he could only sleep under an umbrella with the sprinkler spraying his face.

I have never read or watched anything involving Daredevil.


sasazuka - 2013-11-30

Oy, if W.C. Fields liked getting sprayed in the face while he slept, then he'd love my CPAP machine.


Syd Midnight - 2013-12-04

It also involves binaural sound, which is back in vogue because it's no longer prohibitively expensive compared to stereo (which it predates). Binaural simulates the folds of your ear to give an eerily realistic 3-D effect on headphones. You can hear "in front", "above", and "behind" as well as left and right.

Pink Floyd's "The Final Cut" album is an example, from back when you had to physically build a human head with rubber ear canals for the microphones and place amplifiers around it. It's like a subtle uncanny valley for your ears (binaural, not Final Cut) and makes for great earphones listening (as does Final Cut, if you'd rather hear cruise missiles and mopey Roger Waters in 3-D than some chicks fingernails).


Syd Midnight - 2013-12-04

ASMR roleplay:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4FW__s6VDWc
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SBNha0PuBMI

Dunno why whispering girls works so well with it, but that's why there's always whispering women and choirs on Rog albums... he loves binaural:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=g3xdudVGkCU
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GKKNOW0t5H0
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_w9is_vRPMI

Note that it loses all its effect when listened to on speakers, cuz binaural simulates the outer structure of your ears, so listening to it out loud puts it all out of phase.


sasazuka - 2013-11-30

I like my ASMR videos like I like my hypnosis videos, if it's a guy, I don't want to see his face (at least not if he's middle aged or older). So this one passes my test.


sasazuka - 2013-11-30

This one's got a pretty good "tape hiss" effect, even though I'm aware it almost certainly wasn't recorded on tape. I think it's just the white noise when they bring up the microphone sound levels to hear the little noises, but the not-actually-tape-hiss enhances the ASMR effect.

It actually reminds me, in a weird way, of Mr. Dressup (Ernie Coombs), when he'd do crafts on his show, where there's no background music of any kind, Mr. Dressup would speak intermittently, and you would hear the scissors cutting and the paper rustling, plus a slight background hiss because it was shot on videotape.


kingofthenothing - 2013-11-30

How to Basic needs to copy this exact thing and then smash an egg on the face.


pyslexic dharmacist - 2013-12-01

27:25!?!


misterbuns - 2013-12-01

yall niggaz aint shit till you tripped balls in a sensory deprivation tank.


mashedtater - 2013-12-01

he had the option to get one with closed eyes but its better for him if they maintain eye contact


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