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Comment count is 19
Bort - 2014-01-06

I bet he was reacting more to the crazy person who couldn't quite process the reality of a gun in her face, than to the power of Jebus.


memedumpster - 2014-01-06

Probably wanted to be an armed robber, not a murderer.


Oscar Wildcat - 2014-01-06

Reductionist!


RocketBlender - 2014-01-06

My thoughts exactly. I'm sure he's not the only one out there who'se above killing, but not stealing.


SteamPoweredKleenex - 2014-01-06

It's probably not loaded. Taking a loaded weapon to a crime is usually treated as an automatic attempted murder charge, no?


SolRo - 2014-01-06

*takes down notes*

any other advice SPK?


SteamPoweredKleenex - 2014-01-06

Don't do it in the first place would probably be my best advice.

I know most of this stuff from a buddy that used to work the graveyard weekend shift at a Kinko's in a really bad neighborhood. He was the only one who had to be informed by a patron what a burst of gunfire outside sounded like and that the proper response was to join everyone else on the floor. While it was probably stupid of him (since company policy is usually to cooperate with criminals and let the cops use the camera footage to arrest them later), he was "held up at gunpoint" and refused, so the dude left. As he was going, he saw the guy just had a metal pipe in his jacket pocket to simulate a gun barrel (thereby dodging the murder charges if caught).


Mister Yuck - 2014-01-06

That or guys doing stick-ups at Kinkos can't afford guns.


oddeye - 2014-01-06

Pretty sure he left cause it was just taking too long and would have taken even longer if he had to fight with some crazy woman.


SolRo - 2014-01-06

Like they'd show video of every time that similar situations ended with a gunshot to the face.


Old People - 2014-01-06

Reminds me of a video of a similar lady trying to cast a Mexican kid out of a Starbucks IN THE NAME OF JESUS. Didn't work that time.

Also, once when I was reduced to telemarketing I got an answering machine message that said "we ain't here right now, but you have a blessed day and go on and leave a message, unless you're a bill collector, in which case we rebuke you in the name of Jesus!"


Riskbreaker - 2014-01-06

There you go, no need to have guns anymore, just use the power of god to fight crime. Case closed.


ashtar. - 2014-01-06

I wonder if it would work the other way.
"I command and rebuke you to hand over your ATM card and pin number in the name of Jesus! The holy spirit compels you!"


SteamPoweredKleenex - 2014-01-06

I'd love to see that. Go into a Hobby Lobby or a Christian bookstore and run up to the manager: "Jesus needs all the cash in the register, quick! Hurry and empty the till or Satan will win!"


BorrowedSolution - 2014-01-06

They'd burn you both as witches: Nobody gets between a True Forced Christian and his green. Nobody!


Mister Yuck - 2014-01-06

So I'm guessing this was staged. What are the odds that her husband is a fat guy with that exact hoodie in his closet?


BorrowedSolution - 2014-01-06

I have a rock that keeps tigers away.

Do you see any tigers?

Told ya.


Centennial Ostrich - 2014-01-06

''Criminals are a cowardly, supersticious lot...''


Jet Bin Fever - 2014-01-07

The music and narration are so goddamn annoying. How can people watch TV like this?


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