Please tell me they found a way to put Louise in this.

Please tell me that during one of the sex scenes Gene walks in with his megaphone and spams the fart noise until it's over.

By the time she turns 30, Louise is going to be simultaneously the dictator of America and the greatest dominatrix in history. Don't tell me you don't want to see that porn movie.

"The Oval Orifice"

Was it the guy who plays Teddy?

As for Louise, if I were the casting director, I'd go for Kristen Schaal. Barring that, maybe Dani Jensen or Lexi Belle.

More like, "baring that," am I right?

Haha no. He's Jimmy. It's weird. I didn't know he did porn. Maybe I should do it too. My ex girlfriend and I did amateur porn for a comedy porn fest a few years ago so I'm not shy..

Also, Izzy: given the stories you've told here, I'm not surprised at all. If you don't feel like telling us who the actress was, what was she like back then? Did you see her career (huh, huh) coming?

Hahaha no she's a baker, I assume. There's this festival in Portland and Seattle called Hump that's hosted by Dan Savage and all the film is destroyed during the show. It's just a lot of fun but you can win $$$. We didn't, even though I thought Pornlandia was pretty clever (if you search it someone ripped off my fucking name!) I was referring to Kris Slater. That's not his real name but since he's in the business I'm sure he doesn't mind me saying that, if he even remembers me in the first place. So just for the record, none of the people I have slept with have gone on to pursue porn careers after dumping me :)

but him and I just sort of knew each other, smoked weed, etc. He was acting and I was music.

And Guardians of the GLBT is a movie that has to be made.

Was the Finite Zest available for all to see?

Yep. It's super fun! They're also doing one in Olympia this year. Ours' was pretty funny but lacked the production values of the winners' submissions.

Fuckit here's another one: Richard Fucklater's Manhood. Porn-Hollywood can you hear me knocking?

Well, if you want to feel better, imagine how joyless sex jokes must be to all porn stars.

or sex itself, for that matter

My favorite porn parody is still The King's Cock by Brazzers (it's The King's Speech except with fucking) but the zombie butt fiction reference on this one looks VERY promising.

Surely they've got to have some creative/amusing gay porn, right? If they don't already, maybe gay porn producers should go and hire some Tumblr ladies who are active in the slash fiction community. I'm sure they could cook up a ton of Sherlock Holmes/ Star Trek/ Road Rovers parody films! Or is the slash community looked down upon by gay dudes? You know, like how most "lesbian" porn is made by guys, for guys, and scant few lesbians actually watch it?

rover divers

The EvilHomer says : Surely they've got to have some creative/amusing gay porn, right?

You would think, but decades of searching have yielded only one Egyptian themed porn from the 80's, which was still rather phoned in, but had nice sets and costumes.

I want 2001 : An Ass Odyssey, or at least a halfway decent attempt at The Holy Mountin'.

What about Brokeback Mountain, or Top Gun? There must be HUNDREDS of Batman parodies, too; you'd think gay parodies could pretty much write themselves.

http://www.poetv.com/video.php?vid=41634

Granted, it's taking awhile for Western pornographers to catch up on video game culture. Japan produces lots of great Street Fighter flicks, but you almost never see anything that cool here! Maybe the occasional Tomb Raider parody, but they're rarely very good, and they never stay true to the franchise. Same goes for another bizarre internet fetishes. Japan has mainstream companies offering high budget, live-action tentacle vore porn, whereas here in the US, you're hard pressed to find even college-basement hypno wrestling clips.

Make no mistake, for every Bob's Boners, there are thousands of forgettable "I'm a chick, you're a dude, let's fuck" flicks.

At this point, I'd even settle for My Horse Dicked Brony : Friendship With Benefits is Magic.

"Ass Pirates of the Caribbean"

There's some really creative gay porn out there. I probably won't watch this movie (I couldn't even make it through Pirates, the R or porn one.) W/r/t my above comment above with the film festival, the one that won that year wasn't necessarily that funny, or a parody, or.. well it's hard to explain but it was one of the more beautiful things I've ever seen on screen, porn (gay or straight) or otherwise, feature film or amateur porn. Everyone (including Savage) was just taken aback and just like the Simpsons, it was the Pukeahontas to everyone else's (including my) Man Getting Hit By Football. I can't name names (literally) but you can probably find some of their other stuff, which isn't porn, just beautiful and a little macabre.