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Comment count is 40
EvilHomer - 2015-01-20

Poor guy. He reminds me of a black Chris Chan. I hope he doesn't hurt himself, and perhaps some internet viewers will be kind and buy him a laptop?


Maggot Brain - 2015-01-20

No, let's not go down that road. The last this this guy needs is his house to be burned down and gang stalked.


infinite zest - 2015-01-20

Well, the very first YT comment mentions that he'd like to buy this guy a laptop, and I would too. My laptop (which works fine with programs like Audacity) was less than 0 used, and judging by the number of hits so far, it'd be less than a single game of Pac Man if everyone pitched in.

That being said, I wonder how this was being filmed? It's been a while since I went into an apple store, but I don't think you could do much more with the laptops than check out Garageband, surf the internet, stuff like that, but the history would immediately be wiped and it definitely didn't let you save a file. So that means that either the laptop was taking video and an asshole Apple employee saved and uploaded it, or he's recording the video on a docked phone that's capable of video. In the latter case, most phones capable of video have some recording app (Apple = garageband, Droid = something I'm sure..) but the BEST way to do it is to skip all of that and just use Voice Memo, which all phones have. Seriously it's all I use to record my music, and it's ready to go in m4a format. Plus, you're avoiding all the background noise from people walking around what's almost always a busy environment.


spikestoyiu - 2015-01-20

Maybe he can just save his money and buy his own laptop like a normal human adult.

He isn't a particularly good rapper.


infinite zest - 2015-01-20

Good point, but something about recording in an Apple Store in the middle of the day leads me to believe that he doesn't necessarily have the option of saving up said money. Without breaking any poe laws I'm assuming he lives at home with his folks, or is maybe on the street.


fluffy - 2015-01-20

Youtube lets you record, upload, and edit videos directly from a webcam, like what's built into every single Apple monitor and laptop. And chances are if he was using the built-in upload-from-webcam function the video was waiting for him wherever he next got Internet access.


RocketBlender - 2015-01-21

I was about to say it before spike did; Maybe it's a generational thing, but I don't get the mentality behind things like crowdfunding or things like 'This guy's trying to make it, if we all chip in, we can get him a laptop!'

Like I said, maybe it's a generational thing, but I've always been of the mindset that if you want something. You save up for it yourself.

Judging by the guy's clean shave, clothes, and jewelery, I really don't think he's living on the streets, either.

As for how it's being filmed, I know there's a few apps that basically immediately record straight to a youtube or livestream video. He may have been using one of those to show he can freestyle when he was interrupted, which would also explain why he uploaded it in the first place, the program just kept going.

It's either that or, as you suggested, someone in that apple store is a huge asshole for uploading this.


EvilHomer - 2015-01-21

How is he going to save up money for a laptop when his career is as a rapper? A rapper who needs a laptop to succeed in his career?

His dress is perfectly congruent with the homeless. Most homeless do not appear as haggard and uncleanly as the ones that occupy our popular imagination; in fact, most homeless are virtually indistinguishable from "normal" people, and as such may pass completely unnoticed. He's not living in a ditch, of course, but it's entirely possible that he's sleeping at a group home, city shelter, or even tent commune erected for displaced felons.


Shoebox Joe - 2015-01-21

Isn't a big swathe of Poe-Tv goers Tom Waits fans?


infinite zest - 2015-01-21

The way I see it, if I saw somebody getting busted at a stationary store for writing poetry in one of the store's notebooks with one of the store's pens, I'd probably just buy it for them, or if I worked there, put it on my employee tab. Doesn't matter what the quality of the poetry; it's an extra 2 bucks or whatever and that'd make someone happy. Obviously the employee can't give away a laptop (even though they're made for close-to-zero dollars) but I'd gladly give a little money to help this guy achieve his dream.


spikestoyiu - 2015-01-22

The thing is, you don't need a fucking Macbook to create great hip-hop. First of all, you need a half-decent rapper, which this dude isn't. So he's already shit out of luck. But a large chunk of the golden age of hip-hop was created very primitively, using tapes.


EvilHomer - 2015-01-22

A large chunk of the golden age of hiphop also died in the ghetto, forgotten, destitute, and penniless. The golden age rappers who actually made it were the few people lucky enough to catch the eye of the gatekeepers, wealthy white music moguls eager to exploit new talent.

You can certainly make a career out of rap using tapes, assuming you can actually find gear that old. Much in the same way that you can still make a career out of airplane manufacturing, with nothing but your backyard and a set of carpentery tools.


Oscar Wildcat - 2015-01-20

Pay him no heed: he's just goin' HAM.


Xenocide - 2015-01-20

http://tinyurl.com/p5fq35n


Scrotum H. Vainglorious - 2015-01-20

If he were a cute white kid the store staff would have left him alone and that kid would have 1 million+ views for this uploaded video.

Ok, maybe in 2009 but not now.


EvilHomer - 2015-01-20

Eight year-old with a sympathetic disability like leukemia, or pretty white woman with high cheek bones and a sexy flannel wardrobe.


spikestoyiu - 2015-01-20

Based on their conversation, it sounds like this dude does this ALL THE TIME.


oddeye - 2015-01-20

So just ban him and bounce his ass out the mall. Problem solved.


That guy - 2015-01-21

I don't know if I want to take the bait on this thread, but stars for "sexy flannel wardrobe".


Gmork - 2015-01-21

Jesus christ. Why can't you just accept the fact that skin color has nothing to do with loud annoying behavior in a store being generally disliked? His shit was unnecessarily loud. Sure, most people in that room probably didn't want to hear rap, but I bet you they'd have had the same reaction to death metal played at that volume.

5 stars for the idiocy of some of the comments I've been reading.


EvilHomer - 2015-01-21

Geeze Louise, Gmork, you don't have to throw a Chimpout over this!


I mean, where would the Beastie Boys be today if people had told them to Be Quiet! and they obeyed? If they hadn't made sure to crank their shit to eleven and Party Hard at every possible opportunity, regardless of the consequences?

But oh, since they're *white* you think it's cool.


spikestoyiu - 2015-01-21

"So just ban him and bounce his ass out the mall."

That's what this employee is attempting to do.


oddeye - 2015-01-21

They have security for that kind of stuff. Shit rapper that you know causes problems shows up, call the mallcops first then ask him to leave. Either way he's getting escorted out.

That's probably what they do for most black people in an Apple store anyway, why discriminate against this one guy and treat him different? Just cause he can't rap? It's a fucking disgrace.


spikestoyiu - 2015-01-21

Like I see where you're going with this and I get the joke and it's great and whatever, but I think you traditionally ask someone to leave yourself before even bothering to call mall security. In addition to being the friendlier move, it's usually more efficient. I haven't worked in a mall in a long time, and it was only one mall, but the security guards were slow and essentially worthless. I worked in a record store while those still existed and whenever we suspected anyone of shoplifting (only black people though because we let white people do whatever they want. We took Asians on a case-by-case basis), we told them to leave or else we'd call security. What we didn't tell them was that they'd likely be able to rob us blind before security even showed up. It usually worked. The few times we had to call security it worked out for the best as those people usually ended up getting physical and I wasn't about to get into a fist fight over a 2Pac cassette.

I did have to call security to escort me out of the building once because I refused to sell a Biggie Small CD to a girl who couldn't have been any older than 13. Some like 17 year-old white knight overheard this and stood outside of the store threatening to come back with his buddies and beat me up later that night.


Shoebox Joe - 2015-01-21

The guy in the video is eight years old?

I know kids are growing fast, but sheesh!


Rodents of Unusual Size - 2015-01-20

What saddens me is there are so many opportunities for professional rap stars and this kid just needs access to a computer to do it. For shame, Apple store.


Gmork - 2015-01-21

For a second I thought you were serious. Just a second.


Jet Bin Fever - 2015-01-20

The employee handled it really well. He wasn't confrontational at all.


oddeye - 2015-01-20

I agree, he was a completely spineless pussy about the whole thing. Ruin the shopping experience of the other 100 customers and make your staff feel scared and intimidated. Awesome job Store Team Lead or whatever bullshit title they have for expendable scrub manager of expendable scrub drones.


The Mothership - 2015-01-20

you're right oddeye, the 140lb Team Playing Stooge should have clotheslined the 200lb artist in residence, quit on the spot, and denounced all capitalist scum while the video feed was still on.


Rodents of Unusual Size - 2015-01-20

seriously, oddeye. I have managed retail and it sucks fucking ass. You have to deal with homeless people, crazy people, crazy homeless people, all manner of drug addicts, and the occasional guy with a gun.

The thing you have to keep in the back of your mind is a) will someone complain to my boss, b) will my boss get mad at me and c) how long will I have to listen to my boss drone on about things I don't want to listen to or care about.

It's bad business and more importantly it's a threat to other people there because they deserve to feel safe and yes, having a volatile dude with learning disorders there who yells bloody murder like a child is not good business or making anyone feel safe.


EvilHomer - 2015-01-21

My job has me dealing almost exclusively with homeless people, crazy people, crazy homeless people, all manner of drug addicts, and the occasional guy with a gun. They really aren't as bad as folks make them out to be.

The Apple employee handled it well enough, I guess. I find it hard to sympathize with him, since he works for fucking Apple, that sniveling little class-traitor, but as Mr Mothership implies, he did about as well as he could given his physical and sociological limitations. A better idea might have been to lead the guy outside the store first (perhaps signaling backup to accompany you), and THEN drop the banhammer on him. Apple Guy clearly had prior rapport with Rap Artist, and Rap Artist seemed both a) close to having a panic reaction and b) compliant and looking to bargain. Leverage that, get him out of the store first, then escalate. Don't just skip straight to the passive aggressive power trip, especially when the rap artist wasn't disrespecting *you*, he was disrespecting your shitty Orwellian store for jerks.

Or, better yet, give the dude a dang iPad! I'm sure you've got a beater sitting around somewhere, or if not, there's ways to make merchandise disappear without it turning up as shrinkage; you said you were his friend, you lying sack of poop, but what have you ever done for him?!


Jet Bin Fever - 2015-01-21

Keep in mind, we're only seeing a very small interaction in what is possibly a pretty complicated relationship. We handle lots of "altered mental status" patients, and it can be terrifying. I'm just saying, I sympathize with the guy. Sure Apple sucks, but you can't criticize the employees for having a job.


EvilHomer - 2015-01-21

Counterpoint: yes I can.

Nobody forced him to work for Apple. He could have easily found a more respectable career, like rooster-fight promoter, meth terrorist, or snuff-film director.


oddeye - 2015-01-21

If I were the manager fella all I'd have to do is imagine this cRapper (see what I did there?) just insulted an iMac or some shit. Then I'd give him the big boot and a leg drop and he'd be out for the 3 count. Then trainers and EMTs would drag him to the morgue.

End of story.


That guy - 2015-01-21

Apple wants to sell product for a profit + doesn't want loud surprise performances every fucking day = Hitler and Goebbels

This is what poetv actually believes.


EvilHomer - 2015-01-21

Don't be so melodramatic, That guy. Nobody thinks Apple is Hitler or Goebbels.

They're Hess, or Himmler, tops.


That guy - 2015-01-21

Would you say the employee was Gestapo, or SS, or more like a reluctant combatant?


EvilHomer - 2015-01-21

Good question. Apple tech support is more like the Gestapo, and the Heer, probably an employee of a third party store that carries a limited selection of Apple products, e.g. a guy who works at Sprint or AT&T. I wouldn't say this employee is full SS either, as that's a position if breeding and honor reserved for management, marketers, and some of the more prolific hipsters (such as iJustine, She-Wolf of the iS).

The employee in this video would probably be either an enlisted man - a grunt serving in one of the Waffen-SS foreign divisions - or else a concentration camp guard.


That guy - 2015-01-22

hmmm interesting
Applecare = Luftwaffe?
Am I getting this right??


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