06?! Jesus. Maybe a rare, vintage-Italian-with-gold-trim, once-driven-by-Ian-Fleming, outlaw biker.

In his defense, I've seen Army captains turn out pretty badly, but Army captains are only 03s, and I think the outlaw biker recruitment standards cut off at 6 figure salaries.

What paygrade are Coast Guard Captains? Do you guys even have Captains?

Its the same as Navy ranks. O6.

Coast Guard Captain, that must be the life. 0k+ a year, plus benefits, and all you have to do is... what? Sit on the beach and make sure no whales wash up?

Forget navy captains becoming bikers. The Hell's Angels are essentially a white supremacist organization.

And you don't just walk around by yourself with your patches on.
This guy is a compulsive liar and he's lucky to be alive.

I'm sure Coast Guard captains work just as hard as any colonels.

Is pretending to be a hipster the same thing as being one?

Only if you started pretending to be one before it was cool.

Pretending to be -a soldier- is a crime; I dunno about pretending to be a sailor, though. I think the shame of being a sailor is enough to discourage most wannabes, SEALs or not.

P.S. please stop calling sailors "soldiers".

Pretending to be a doctor is a crime given the right circumstances. Someone collapses at a restaurant and you've been telling people you're a doctor they'll expect you to help. I guess that's the time you fess up, or you go for it. If the person dies because you didn't know what you were doing though you're in deep shit.

If you pretend that you're a soldier that's really shitty, and if you're taking advantage of VA services that's illegal, but otherwise you're just telling a story. People did that all the time after WW2. Doesn't make it right but it happened.

Pretending to be a member of any branch of the Armed Forces is only illegal if you attempt to get government benefits. Otherwise, it's just free speech and a potential ass kicking.

@bluevein

Um, the biggest perk is the free Applebee's.

I was in the Coast Guard Special Forces. I did two tours in Hawaii. Some of the thing I saw, man... some of the things I did... you wouldn't understand unless you've been there.

The entire Coast Guard is a special force.

http://peecee.dk/uploads/092012/Ralph_Wiggum_-_I-m_special.png

Not special in the way you troll. Any jerk with a weapon can take a life, it takes true courage and valor to save lives.

actually it's a crime to pretend that you received a medal/commendation etc in order to receive financial gain.

I'm pretty sure if a prosecutor is pissed enough, he could interpret a high rank as a commendation, and free beer as financial gain.

Or selling their own "Navy SEAL training course" or whatever.

Military fakers are a particularly pathetic brand of lowlife, and should get called out. However, there are people who go about this business with a lot lower profile than Big Don. There is definitely something quite smug about this guy (a smug SEAL? never) and his whole business.
The goofiest part to me is how it's spread to his wife. Parents, siblings, and perhaps most obnoxiously of all wives telling real deal guys where the hands stand on the clock is very tedious.
I can't really knock Don too hard though. He's trying to make a buck and embarrass some idiots, and is by no means the only guy, military or otherwise, with an annoying ego-persona.

The perfect POETV video is one in which you hate all parties involved

^ WORD
I think this one is ever-so-close but not quite there.

scratch that, watch it all.

it's a shitty cgi-laden skit of a bombing run on fake seals, wherein his fat wife plays an f-16 pilot (STOLEN VALOR), and he misquotes captain ahab ("from hell's heart i spit at thee").

wow.

also one of the people they pretend to bomb is a bonafide exhibit. he is a pedophile who was pretending to be a seal, and has lengthy, sobbing videos filmed inside of a tent in which he tries to justify his doodling of a 12-year-old.

aaaand i'm going outside, the weather is too nice for this bullshit.