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Comment count is 24
boner - 2016-04-04

You fucked up, Graymm.


TheSupafly - 2016-04-04

I was going to give it a few days to see if anyone posts this before I did.


Old_Zircon - 2016-04-04

Holy shit:

http://play.textadventures.co.uk/Play.aspx?id=qffhegpwie2nx5bu 2l-p6a


poorwill - 2016-04-05

King's Quest V is so awful.


bopeton - 2016-04-05

Like... he couldn't just walk away while they were arguing?


SixDigitDebt - 2016-04-05

It worked for Sir Robin.


duck&cover - 2016-04-05

Brave Sir Robin bravely ran away. Brave Sir Robin, Sir Robin!


poorwill - 2016-04-05

I think you are supposed to play an instrument in this scene. Playing an instrument for no reason is the solution to several puzzles in this unbelievably shitty game.


Old_Zircon - 2016-04-05

It's a harp.

Because puns.


poorwill - 2016-04-05

that's even worse!


theSnake - 2016-04-05

Amazing, how'd they get Hillary to lend her voice talent?


memedumpster - 2016-04-05

Iconic!


gmol - 2016-04-05

The text version somehow left more to the imagination.


Old_Zircon - 2016-04-05

The text version was a lot more credible. I couldn't believe how much worse the CD-ROM version was when I first saw clips of it.


Bobonne - 2016-04-05

Imagine me as a preteen trying to play it on the NES. Or was it on the SNES? ...either way.


Old_Zircon - 2016-04-05

Imagine me seeing the VGA version of this game on the shelves but not being able to run it on my family's 286 with green-on-black monitor (beefed up with an EGA card to give 16 different shades of green!), then finally being able to pick it up when my dad got a raise and we upgraded to a Packard Bell 386 and discovering the truth.

I still have a soft spot for the thing though.


Nominal - 2016-04-05

Gabriel Knight 3 might as had the single dumbest puzzle in adventure game history, but King's Quest 5 was probably the dumbest overall game that led the genre to the grave.

Although the golden bridle puzzle in KQ4(3?) might be the worst. As I remember it was literally impossible. You didn't even know you were looking for a bridle (you had to look in the code to find that "bridle" was an in game object), there was one very specific spot on a desert island beach one wouldn't suspect to find a gold bridle, and you had to comb every pixel of the beach spamming "look bridle" to find the bridle that you wouldn't even know was in the game unless you looked at the code.


kingjackhammer - 2016-04-05

ALLWOMENEVER.MP4


Miss Henson's 6th grade class - 2016-04-05

Five stars for the pun in the description!


Cube - 2016-04-05

You know the thing where this guy says "we have skulls and bones in our logo, are we the bad guys?"

Didn't NO ONE in the Kings Quest developer team stop and ask "this is the 800th way to die in the game that we're implementing... Are we the bad guys?"


Old_Zircon - 2016-04-05

I think people do tend to forget just how brutal most other games were. Sure you could die in all sorts of unpredictable, unfair ways but you could SAVE ANYWHERE and had UNLIMITED LIVES. As someone who came from Atari and NES that seemed incredibly liberating. Not to mention the near photorealistic VGA graphics!

People who had more experience with PC games new better, of course.


Nominal - 2016-04-09

That approach was actually MORE sadistic given the numerous "you can't win anymore but we're not going to tell you" instances.


Siebenstein - 2016-04-05

"Computer Gaming World in 1991 praised the "tour de force" VGA graphics, sound card audio, non-typing parser and user interface, but criticized the gigantic, yet almost pointless, desert map. The magazine concluded that the game was best for new adventurers because of its easy puzzles, and a "pleasant diversion" for more-experienced players."


Old_Zircon - 2016-04-05

I do remember the text parser ones being quite a bit harder but I played very little of them. The desert map did take about 20 minutes to map out the first time back in 5th or 6th grade, whenever it was I got this.

Most of the puzzles weren't that bad once you realized they were mostly pun based, but the things where you could mess up near the beginning and end up with an unwinnable game hours later were brutal. I definitely remember getting permanently stuck in that forest somehow or other.


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