So, how to make techno?

There aren't any samples in this.

Other than the drums, I mean.

I'm not into techno much, but I've been to my fair share of bars with techno/edm dj's or whatever. 90% of the time it was some kid, probably named Dylan or something, sweating stepped-on MDMA through a flannel handkerchief headband while triggering shitty fruity loops sequences.

This isn't bad.

If you go to the supermarket when the shifts are changing, you can get two free samples of everything their offering, which is like getting whole lunch's worth of food for free.

Techno's not really my favorite thing in the world either but when it's done like this it's pretty good.

The old stuff was done like this a lot of the time.

And yeah, the stuff you just happen to hear because it's on in public is almost always pretty sorry.

Electronic music in general is either among the most creative interesting kinds of music or among the laziest, depending on who's doing it and for what.

If it's on sale in the checkout line at Whole Foods you can safely avoid it.

This is weird analogy - but bad electronic music reminds me of a guy I lived with. He was a dim bulb and smoked tons of grass. I've had other friends that smoked plenty and made good art. This guy drew horrible anime shit, stoned out of his melon. The creative "tool" he was using was too much for him to handle. It was like throwing gas on a dumb dumb fire. Electronic music/computer aided music reminds me of that.

I think I've met that guy, too. At least two of him.

Yeah, I kept waiting for the eggs.

It was my favorite part, too. I had the tag then changed my mind.

Once it gets past the oven stuff to the actual techno it's pretty unremarkable.

But I like the guy's over all style.