I have imagined, Maury. I have imagined.

This is like, a super-dupe.

Still, 4 stars because I'm deeply infatuated with this kid. Something about the hopeless, brave fight against reality she insists on carrying out, combined with her classy eloquence, makes this one sexy lady.

WhatEVA! I do what I want!

Can't entirely downrate it as a dupe since it's the full length clip, but yeah, the "MY BABY" thing goes a bit back. newcomers should be sure to click the Maury tag for the "my baby in slo-mo" clip which still cracks me up to this day.

I'm sorry, but even the sad piano music can't keep me from laughing.

"I told her to get up!"

I think the guy was getting up enough for the both of them.

This version cuts off the 'preview' for the next segment, where teenage girls in juvenile hall yell at her and make her cry.

Why do bad things happen to good wiggers?
WHY GOD, WHY??!!

While I was watching this clip the Ace of Base song All That She Wants started to play on my itunes. I laughed so hard that I cried.

In your room! IN YOUR ROOM!

Yeah, don't like, get family counseling or anything. Go on Maury. That'll fix things.

What exactly is it like to be in Maury's audience?

The ultimate episode of any talk show. Profusive swearing and the checklist of public places makes this a cut above the rest. Or below, I'm not sure.

THEY DID NOT COME BACK RIGHT AFTER TIHS WTF!?

I'd hit it.

Not one. Not two. But tha-ree different times.

"My 15-year-old daughter's had sex 300 times, but by then, who's counting?!? Huzzah!!!"
"Heyooooooooo!"
Let's see if this can be reposted at least as many times as she's had sex. What would really be cool is a follow-up ... how old is this clip now? (I'm not watching it again to find out.)

Mama is a big-lipped hunchback, Vicky talks like a mongoloid, and Maury has an impenetrable air of empathetic indifference when he talks.

This is great.

Having brains is not one of her problems.

There was a moment some time ago when I suspected that she was faking it, but then I realized that she was too loud and inarticulate to be acting.

And her mother still looks like Robert K. durant from Darkman. That might actually be the source of this family's problems.

Why oh why have people stopped sending their awful children to military school?

Man, this girl is an emotional cripple who swears like a sailor in public at complete strangers and has completely insane ideas about sex. I tell you, if she also drinks too much, she's pretty much my ideal woman.

Man, Maury's staff went to the best schools in the country for what? To produce and coach fake dialogue segments with attention-desperate rednecks?

She must be sterile if she's had unprotected sex 300 times and not conceived ONCE. Either that or chlamidiya ridden.

You throw up enough shots you're bound to hit something!