How do you get out?

You open the door.

It's a mini. When you need to leave, you pick it up and move it onto the road.

I always make it a point to hit whatever douchebag parked me in a few times on the way out when that happens. Though I guess here, he parked himself in and he'd have to break a few rules of physics to get that done

roachbud must have a piece of shit car, a fucking piece of shit car. That fucking pile of shit never gets him very far.

and the spring pokes him in the balls.

ouch ouch ouch...

The Roachmobile

I have a 4 year old used Impala, no springs poking in the balls. I just don't give a fuck about material shit. It's not like bumping bumpers is going to ruin your car, since afterall that's what they were designed for. I'm not about to wait for some dickbag to move his car so I can go home.

Any provocative bumper stickers on it?

just a Bad Brains one

If I ever catch you talking shit about the classic Mini again I will feed you your own lower body

As a current owner (and summer daily driver) of one of these little monsters I have to say that the driver has a lot more to do with it than the car. I'm thoroughly impressed.

And might I add, "cherubic" is a very under-used adjective. I will endeavour to use it in everyday conversation.