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Comment count is 57
Konversekid - 2008-04-11

Not enough stars.
Also, why was the host feeling up that judge?


Frank Rizzo - 2008-04-12

the video is a trick, everyone is retarded. Not just Eli.


Enjoy - 2008-04-11

I've watched this a number of times today.


takewithfood - 2008-04-11

I tapped out after 1:30, but soon realized that I would have to finish the clip or I would have nightmares. So I finished the clip. I think I'm still going to have nightmares.


takewithfood - 2008-04-11

Also, the preloader alone is 5-worthy.


fucking batman - 2008-04-11

i jerked off 3 times while watching this. beaut.
i blame the internet


citrusmirakel - 2008-04-11

I fully expected Envy's ears to start bleeding from Eli's psychic powers.


citrusmirakel - 2008-04-12

Watching this again, I just noticed Envy's look of concern to the judges when Eli goes into his first seizure. Makes me want to five star it all over again.


GuyCorngood - 2008-04-11

Better than any Tim and Eric skit.


Honest Abe - 2008-04-11

did he have a seizure


theSnake - 2008-04-11

Ah jeez that was brutal


kingarthur - 2008-04-11

Basically the rap equivalent of four white guys with guitars, Led Zeppelin and Pink Floyd T-Shirts, and a storage space topractice in.

Also, the heart-shaped camera insert made me squeal.


violenza - 2008-04-11

What defines the best of POEtv: An urge to hide behind the couch before the video finishes to avoid the awkward radiating from your monitor combined with a sudden flavorful burst of love for humanity. You go, Eli.


Thatcher Pennywhistle - 2008-04-11

yes.


TheSurgeon - 2008-04-12

Stars for everyone and everything.


Enjoy - 2008-04-13

This is easily in my top-5 videos and the pre-load image ranks #1. There's something absurd about any rap battle and adding this guy is like adding an absurd multiplier.


Smellvin - 2008-04-11

Eli is bestest.

Also, if you are still left wanting more epic rap battle goodness, I'd recommend this: http://youtube.com/watch?v=hrDJL_3QEEM


Billy Buttsex - 2008-04-11

I'm not sure whether I hate myself or not for liking this, but since everyone on this thing already hates me: I HATE MYSELF FOR LIKING THIS.


fatatty - 2008-04-11

Holy shit that was awkward. 5 stars for Eli, the little retarded rapper who could.


Adramelech - 2008-04-11

Eli is definitely attempting to scan one of the judges at 2:43.


dr_rock - 2008-04-14

So I guess before that is when he .... rides the snake!


RandomFerret - 2008-04-11

Yeah, that's the way most rap battles go. One guy spouts a bunch of memorized lines that have nothing to do with the situation, and the other one chokes.

But goddamn, that is the best preloader image on this site.


drcrypt - 2008-04-12

Envy's lines were relevant: he ingeniously rhymes "crippled" with "cripple" when dissing Eli.


The God of Biscuits - 2008-04-11

Iron Mic? Is that like Iron Chef?
+5 because I want to believe.


Sean Robinson - 2008-04-11

The judges were so supportive and everyone's trying so hard and I basically had a seizure after this video. I completely lost my shit.


chumbucket - 2008-04-12

agreed high fives to those judges...I was literally on the floor in agony at about the time the heart graphic popped on. such fortitude


Sean Robinson - 2008-04-12

Those are good kids making their mothers proud. I'm not kidding at all.


Dinky Patterson - 2008-04-12

02:26-02:40 is 2001 "Jupiter and Beyond the Infinite" territory.


chumbucket - 2008-04-12

cripes this shot up to 5 stars just for that golden intro!! hell-yeah!


Frank Rizzo - 2008-04-12

ass burgers?


drcrypt - 2008-04-12

Boy, this is nothing like 8 Mile.


drcrypt - 2008-04-12

Also, for a guy who is clearly retarded, he really flipped that "Just like Rosie O'Donnell at a bisexual bridal shower" line.


drcrypt - 2008-04-12

The lyrics, as near as I can decipher them:

I got one question, man
Tell me who next
This nigga's salt letting nigga who did gittin da best
See, I'm the best, man
I did it



Y'all... uh... yeah... yeah.... yo....
See, I'm a letchyoo know who da best
By the hour
Just like Rosie O'Donnell at a bisexual bridal shower
It ain't nuttin' to me, man
I keep it for realz
Look at these , man... *hiccup*
Wit den on da grillz
See, I'm da best
I told you dat
This dude like that he ran in front of the cat
No, I messed up, but I'm going to stay on talk
They told me, man, but you know, I never gonna flock
Look at this dude, he need to stay in da shade
Ain't no wonder why he came out
He already in da gay parade!
I told you man, I gotchoo
Roasted like ever
Y'all know, but my rhymes, they straight up clever
So you step down, off the pedestal
I'm da best, man
You need to go
To da fuckin' depot.


baleen - 2008-04-12


The "judges" definitely tried to be as respectful as they possibly could be under the circumstances. All you can do when a retard makes you laugh is just laugh it off and be nice about it.


chumbucket - 2008-04-12

drcrypt, for the lyrics, you are my lover for today


abeli$con - 2008-04-12

im the best / i told you that / this dude like that he runnin from tha cat / naw, i messed up but ima stay on top / they call me manwich you know im neva gon' flop

so you step down / off the pedestal / im the best man / you need to go to the fucken dental [laughter]


ihounokyaku - 2008-04-12

no
nonononono


Jimmy Labatt - 2008-04-12

I wish I could rap like that


UnderANeonHalo - 2008-04-12

Nothing I can say will do it justice...


Gibbs - 2008-04-12

"Also, why was the host feeling up that judge?"

Because he's gay. But not Eli. He's like Rosie O'Donnell at a bisexual bridal shower. He ran in front of the cat. He's best man. He diid it.


fun nugget - 2008-04-13

I was laughing before I pressed play.


athodyd - 2008-04-13

He had to stop for a little while to allow the Rap Ghosts to enter him.


Rodents of Unusual Size - 2008-04-13

It sounded like "bisexual Bible shower" so I'll give it five stars for that mental image alone.


bopeton - 2008-04-22

All rap sounds like this to me.


Princess v2.1 - 2008-05-08

Eli is straight dope. I'd buy his album in a heartbeat.


Hooper_X - 2008-05-22

Five stars for sheer awkwardness. I'd give a sixth for the preload if I could, but I can't, so I'll just favorite instead.


j lzrd / swift idiot - 2008-06-03

BLAZIN' HAZIN' COULD FUCK THESE NIGGAS UP!


soci-o-path - 2008-08-11

Marv-O really needs a poo, I mean look at the guy, he can't stand still.


JRoy1969 - 2009-03-08

All rap should be like this.


William Batty - 2009-05-27

Amazing.


Pie Boy - 2009-05-30

whenever i watch this video i have this fantasy where something with a hundred legs and fifty eyes slowly crawls out of eli's mouth at 2:27


Mister Shady - 2009-06-14

FIVE STARS

That's what I'd rate this if I could, but I can't because my fucking radio buttons disappeared.


Mister Shady - 2009-06-14

ZOMG WTF WHERE ARE MY BUTTONS!?!

Fuck Google Chrome.


Spastic Avenger - 2009-07-03

Eli's rap is being beamed from Jupiter directly into his head.


Camonk - 2010-05-23

Uh... five uh... five stars. That was definitely something that I just watched. Yes. It was something.


abeli$con - 2011-03-26

this dude like that he runnin from the cat


The Mothership - 2012-04-07

NICE.


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