Children are easier to train. With your help, we can make this damage irreversible by the time they hit 13.

I wish they all had been aborted!

Did they really just admit to trying to brainwash children using baked Goldfish crackers? Please tell me that's just a really obscure metaphor for Jesus, or eternal life, or something not completely fucking evil. Someone restore my faith in humanity.

Those are some children only Jesus would suffer to come unto him.

"Serving helps me grow in my relationship with god"

If I'm on the fence about this whole jesus, ministry, indoctrinating children thing, do you REALLY want me if goldfish crackers is my tipping point?

1: That kid with the buzzcut and the polo shirt buttoned all the way up already wants to be a sniper when he grows up. I can tell.

2: The only kid in the video that actually looks happy is the UNLIMITED GOLDFISH one.

None of those children seem to know or care what they are saying. Except the goldfish one, he sure as hell knows.

It was painful to watch, but I stuck through it to see the goldfish.

"We don't yet have the ability to reason for ourselves and will pretty much blindly follow anything our parents decide to indoctrinate us into! Yaaaaaayyyy!"

the Great Investment kid perfectly embodies the essence of a victim in a jihadi hostage video