No words can express (or deter) my joy right now. Thank you, brothers and sisters. I have to deal with...THIS...almost every day. He also insists on smothering joints with grossly disproportionate amounts of bargain basement rolling tobacco. And this goes beyond any personal vendetta, his rampant ego is well worthy of POE's scrutiny.

"Keep Austin Weird" and as an addendum, keep this asshole away from me.

I love you, man

The best part is that he hates Ayn Rand but detests "consept books that chase the same idea in different forms through out the book..." and pleads "please people if you are writing a book... dont take 30 chapters to say what you can say in 1."

Irony fucking overload.

he LOVES Ayn Rand, sorry

Also, I like how Ayn Rand is the only correctly spelled author because each word in her name doesn't force him to strain himself and learn more than 5 letters.

He is actually my housemate. We live together in a student co-op in Austin, so there is this painful medium struck where I am not technically FORCED to associate with him but cannot ignore him or avoid daily interaction because of the incestuous proximity of our living conditions (house meetings, daily meals in the kitchen, labor, group home theater, parties funded by house money etc).
The other day he put on a business suit that was too large for him and rode his Mary Poppins bicycle to the State Capital building to attempt to "get a job in politics" purely by "scoping the place out". Keep in mind he reeked of his fucking Bali Shag-weed combo and has a lip piercing. He routinely forces his "poetic works" on captive audiences, where even the foreign kids who cannot understand him are still painfully aware of how bad it is. He plays bocci ball in the park with a group of old french men, and they don't like him either.

And no, he does not go to UT. He goes to ACC. I'll let you guess what that one stands for yourself, NOT that there's anything wrong with that...but I'm not even sure he really goes there.

Oh, and he talks in that extremely haughty tone of voice all the time, and he says he has everyone in the building "completely figured out".

I'd like to have a talk with this young man.

I'm so sorry, dude. Fuck.

What would you say? What COULD you say?

I knew a guy in college who talked and sounded exactly like this guy. The last time I saw him he was preparing to force himself on a girl who had passed out. His excuse was "this was what she asked for". While she was passed out. He was escorted out and there was...unpleasantness. No one at that party talked to him after that.

You know he COULD be older than he claims to be...

But in all seriousness creeps like that deserve the savage deathblows they receive

Not to sound cold, but dude, welcome to college. every campus on earth has an abundance of fuckheads like him, even more if you take anything resembling a liberal arts class. One way or the other, you got to deal with him and POEtv is not your therapy group.

that said, he is POEtv worthy, just keep the personal vendetta a secret so we don't think we are turning into some kind of therapy for you. Just shame his ass one the down low.

That said, I think you are a decent contributor, so don't take this personally. Just realize that this dude is one of a million another identically beautiful and unique snowflakes and ignore his ass. ignoring him is the most insulting thing you can possibly do to him. trust me, he lives on your hate, so just forget he is even there if you can, and if yo can't, shut him down and then ignore him.

shhhh. His attempt to use POE for therapy to this degree is, in itself, "evil enough" to be featured on POE proper.

Uhhh...I'm sorry? But I'm pretty sure everyone else got that I am not seriously that upset about it...
Regardless considering the general outpour of support I achieved my goal, which was to make this a lively talkback due to the fact I actually know him and can share hilarious (for me at the very least) details, rather than me having just stumbled upon him randomly and submitted it that way. It was an extension of the joke but um...yeah, I thought everyone was having a good time with this.

Thank you for your kind words in this trying time. It's support like this that helps me soldier on when I feel I'm unable to cope.

And yet he is not the most punchable face in POE TV. Fucking POE TV.

That honour rests with VenomfangX.

Wow, yeah. I thought he was in exile?

this comment gets my 5 stars

Yes, constantly. The Ellen DeGeneres one is one of his favorites. And even in conversation, his voice always sounds like that, and he always makes those painfully self aware facial expressions.

I have a gun you can buy, with bullets

Can't you tell I'm trying to convince someone else to do it?

Take him out back and shoot him, like old yeller.

HA! The big new red one on Nueces and MLK...

...did I just get phished?

If it's new, I might not have been there yet. Just north of MLK, I'm assuming?

Yeah. We're the straightest of the College Houses co-ops but we are the same company as 21st street, I'm afraid

I figured out what you meant. That place is fuckin' HUGE. Can't believe that's a co-op. But it warms my heart to know there's a little POE in West Campus.

Thank you for trying. Why 1:35-oh. OH.