GOTTA BEAT THE LEVEL GOTTA BEAT THE LEVEL

Sega's advertisements convinced me that only assholes played Sega.

You know what?

I was right.

Karma's a bitch, ain't it Sega?

Is Sonic the Hedgehog the only goddamn game the Genesis had?

Sega always bet wrong. I bet wrong on Sega a couple times as an impressionable youth until I finally learned my lesson.

Sega always has good ideas in the beginning, but then at some point they always come to a crossroads, and unswervingly always take the wrong road. Ever since they expanded from the arcade market, they were always using someone else's playbook and running them all wrong. Concentrating on the wrong genres and too much mascot humping on the Genesis, the 32X that they forgot to get developers for or make affordable in any way, the Saturn that cost way too much and peaked with its launch titles. Then they forgot to tell anyone about the Dreamcast until it was abandoned.

And then this year, exactly three months before all broadcast television goes digital they released this:

http://i.gizmodo.com/5146929/the-sega-vision-segas-new-handhel d-that-denies-sonic-exists

A 0 device that touts a format that most people don't use, an analog TV tuner, two measly gigs of memory and then they removed its ability to play even flash games just to keep up appearances.

I swear if they developed a gun, it would have a backwards barrel.

I had a Megadrive as a youth, and loved it dearly. Shining Force, Dynamite Headdy, Story of Thor, Soleil, Alien Soldier, Vectorman, all remembered fondly.
But yeah, they fucked themselves royally with the Mega CD, the 32x, the Saturn...

SEGA!!!