Americans observing 9/11 by trying not to masturbate

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Comment count is 15

Man Who Fights Like Woman

- 2009-09-13

There's literally nothing in this world that'll keep me from masturbating.

KnowFuture

- 2009-09-14

Not even sore, chapped genitals from doing it too much?

FISTFULLofSOUL - 2009-09-14

Hey, don't do the crime if you can't do the time..

Caminante Nocturno

- 2009-09-13

Obama: I'm talking to you, Nina!

All five stars are for the end.

SolRo

- 2009-09-13

One load per tower.

boner

- 2009-09-13

This is a Louis CK joke - You can tell how bad a person you are by how long after 9/11 you waited to masturbate - for me, it was between the first and second tower falling down.

Gwago

- 2009-09-14

For a second there, I actually thought my orgasm made the second tower fall.

Camonk

- 2009-09-13

I forgot that it was 9/11 on 9/11, and honestly I jerked off. But once I remembered what day it was, I didn't do it any more.

mashedtater

- 2009-09-14

when i was younger, i wary of masturbating on holidays like christmas or easter. not so much anymore.

ProfessorChaos

- 2009-09-14

The internet would riot of redtube, youporn, and all the rest went down to observe the occasion.

Jeff Fries - 2009-09-14

A quiet riot

William Burns

- 2009-09-14

I rub one out every time The Onion is funny again.

grimcity

- 2009-09-14

I think their news clips are pretty fantastic... at first I thought they might be Daily Show ripoffs, but I think they translated the Onion over to video pretty nicely. Then again, it's easy to make me laugh.

kwash - 2010-03-30

"It's 9/11. Shame on you."

The Mothership

- 2015-01-26

best part.

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