Phillip Broyles + Q = A perfect fit

I'd been wondering how they were going to screw this up. It's such a great, simple concept in its original form, you just knew some douchebag exec was going to come along and poop on it.

The best part is how at no point in the trailer do his new superpowers appear to serve any useful purpose.

I'm not going to rate this.

Why, why, whyyyyyy did they not have Joe R. Lansdale script this? Besides introducing Hex into a slew of Bruce Timm cartoons, he wrote a handful of Vertigo miniseries where Hex fights grotesque horrors, Lovercraftian and otherwise. He got sued by Edgar and Johnny Winter for the second one because he portrayed them as retarded, flesh-eating wormmen.

Fuck it, 5 stars for reminding me of Joe R. Lansdale.

Lovecraftian, even

A bad ass-cowboy?

Hey, they also have

Megan Fox: I am hot.
Other dude: Are you really hot?
Megan Fox: Yes I am really hot.

Megan Fox: They took all my weapons.
Johna Hex: Even the one in your vagina?
Megan Fox: ESPECIALLY the one in my vagina!!

These are for Toenails. That got me good.

Ben Kingsley plays Gatling Horse.

Put in a singing cowboy outfit. Damn typo.

You care WAY too much. Just way too much. Stop caring so much!

About the typo, or Jonah Hex?

Well the comic is kind of cool and this is basically Wild Wild West II: More Boobs Edition and was written by a script computer program called Scriputer. Who lives on the moon and laughs at us every day.

The way I hear tell, morally-ambiguous gunfighters are an established genre with an awful lot of really good movies already, so right out of the gate, this movie is superfluous. But then they go the extra step of not making use of the known successful techniques of the genre.