You fucking cartoon character.

I take back everything I ever said about you Cena. Whatever your true beliefs, whatever your convictions, you are truly and clearly batshit insane. I am ashamed that I ever doubted you.

Look at it this way Cena,

Now you can complain about the president instead of having to defend all the time. Much more fun.

I know I'm gonna enjoy it :D

"Are you happy POETV?"
Yes sir, yes I am. Too show it, please enjoy this overly long emoticon showwing how happy I am:
o

omg that really is cena_mark

Ther eis no way this is NOT getting favorited and voted five stars like crazy. Hang in there Cena buddy!

I AM A STAR.

Obama will reposess one of your pirate flags, and give it to someone needy.

Please, next one put a revolver in your mouth. If you need someone to post the video, msg me. k?

AH HA HA WE TOLD YOU SO

Your pretend laughs there sounded more like sobs, mark.

By the way, Obama is a better man and will be a better leader than you and everyone like you even deserve.

there goes the 4th wall, eeee

I knew it. I knew it! You're a real fuckin boy, Cena, don't let anyone tell you that you're a sockpuppet!

I knew you were fucking real, dude!

I... I take it back. Whatever I said, you're not a horrible troll. You're either actually a moron, or you're actually a brilliant troll. I'm sorry for everything I said Cena.

All y'all.

Cena_mark has the kind of dedication that Billy Buttsex could only dream of.

I'm sorry for everything I said except for the whole dick-eating thing.

you'll be laughing when the economy tanks? i was gonna say "i doubt that" but you do seem pretty nuts.

Oh my GOD.

I thought at first, at first, that it was just some other dude on the Internet using the Cena_mark name...but...oh my god oh my god...this is real...

I believe what I am trying to say is

http://poetv.com/video.php?vid=45470

The Internets is crazy...

:DDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD

Love.

Oh god cena mark I love you. You are now either the greatest troll or the craziest motherfucker. Or both.

So there is a god.

I am happy, thank you.

Yikes. I'm scared now. Are there any adults here?
(also amused)
(but still scared)

This guy kind of looks like Baleen.

Ahahaha. We told you so.

Cheer up Cena_mark, you could always be a character in a John Waters movie -- you've got the accent!

Hilarity.

I have to admit, I've been pretty darn happy for a few hours now.

Oh, baleen, you kidder you.

Have I been force-feeding you dicks all this time?

I was upset that he mentions North Carolina as "Carolina." No one says "Carolina" besides news anchors, people who don't live here, or recently arrived transplants. But then I see the replica of Captain Blackbeard's flag and realize ol' Edward Teach would've probably said "Carolina" in his day, too. Not to mention he's North Carolina's own pirate since he settle for a while on the N.C. coast and meet his end there fighting Lt. Maynard of the Royal Navy. So that's forgiven.

Ya har, Jim m'boy!

Aww, I get no mention?

Will the real cena_mark please make an insane comment

Why is he painted up like Abe "Knuckleball" Schwartz?

You look exactly like I always imagined you did

This is great!

my god. I thought someone had taken another video and recorded the voice as a joke separately.

I think i was wrong.

Your room is decorated like that of a petulant child.

It's perfect.

Nice! Above and beyond. Well done sir.

this is the GREATEST

I can't believe that some of you guys think this is real. Still, five stars. I cannot wait to hear how the troll himself responds to this (unless this really is him, just trolling us through video. This shit is getting way too meta for me).

PS I am very happy today!

POOR YOU.

Umm... we told you so!

So who else was planning on cutting their hand and crying about it if Obama lost? I'm glad I wasn't the only one with that plan.

Hahahah that's a bouncer?

He sounds exactly as redneck as I expected.

"I'll be laughing last when the economy tanks."...no sir, it is we who shall be laughing because to make ends meet in your pathetic life you will have to sell your body for butthole pleasures of other even smellier and fatter men.

Good day.

Is that correct pronunciation of poeTV?

I have a sneaking suspicion he submitted this himself.

OH MY GOD OH MY GOD OH MY GOD OH MY GOD OH MY GOD NO GODDAMN FUCKING WAY. OH MY GOD.

It's OK, Cena_Mark, just keep an open mind and learn from your mistakes; then you will become one of us.

Nice make-up, though. No wonder you see everything in black and white terms. There are also shades of gay I MEAN GREY FUCK

Is that our old friend theFlu in the YouTube comments? Awesome!

Comments from Youtube:

"You let a ton of babyfur cat fanciers defeat you? "


the image of an army of old catladies attacking this noble young man warms my black heart.

stabbing him with blunt knitting needles! throwing coupons at him! asking him why, WHY he won't wear that sweater we bought him for Christmas with the Russian Blue licking the Calico.

We have reached the event horizon of POETV.

An Hero...shiiiiiiiiiiit

When Obama wins, everybody wins.

Did he actually cut himself? This person has some serious mental health issues.

wow

I would like to point out that I was the first person to notice that baleen is cena_mark. http://www.poetv.com/video.php?vid=42069

I regret I missed this video earlier.

There are simply not enough words in the English language to reflect the glory of this video. Therefore, I won't use any.

:D

OH GOD I was not prepared for the first couple seconds of that video. I mean, I saw the preload image, but fuuuuuck.

This is incredible and awesome, but minus one star for that terror.

"Ha, ha, ha. Shoot. Shoot shoot shoot."

Dear Cena_Mark:

No, no we are not happy. If you're going to, as you quote it, "AN HERO" yourself, you're supposed to cut UP your wrist, not SLASH it.

There is an easy way to memorize it. Think of your wrist like a street or a crosswalk, and think of the razor as you. YOU are supposed to WALK ALONG THE STREET, NOT ACROSS IT. Cut deep and cut up. Sever the arteries you incompetent fool.

These stars are for the people who think this isn't more trolling.

Ok, where did all of Cena's videos go?

Let's hope this video becomes increasingly relevant over the next 48 hours.